Lady A 32-year-old mother of one wrote about her ordeal, aiming to let others learn from how her family and pride pushed her to lose the love of her life.
She has missed the opportunities that reside in her husband but could not forget how she was deceived by personal esteem and family influence to let her husband go, when she needed him, the most.
Her story is touching and considered to be worth being shared with our network, aiming at serving as a lesson to anyone who might be going through this phase of life.
She wrote:
I am writing to you to make someone understand that it's good to appreciate our partners despite their flaws.
I am 32 years of age.
My ex-husband and I dated for 6 years.
We were best of friends.
I waited until he completed college and started work.
My family and his family then met.
We got married and had a son. (7 years old now).
My husband was short-tempered at times but our problems started when I wanted to make him feel he couldn't control me.
Every time we argued, I would pack my bags, go to my family and explain.
My sisters would phone my husband and shout at him.
If he was controlling me I would always dare him that if he wished, he could divorce me.
I never wanted a divorce.
I just had pride and I never wanted to look like a loose woman in his eyes.
One day I pushed him so hard that for the first time, he beat me and locked me outside.
I went to my family, my family took him to the police, every time I looked like I was being abused!
But to be honest, I used to abuse my husband emotionally.
He was arrested and detained.
I was asked by his family to withdraw the case.
I felt that what I was doing was wrong.
My husband was never a violent man, he did what he did because I pushed him to the wall to which he openly knelt and apologized.
I withdrew the charge, and we reconciled.
After three months, I packed my bags after a small issue and he remained alone.
After two days, I
received a call that he was in the hospital.
My family told me that I shouldn't go there because it would look like I was begging him and my sisters believed he was feigning the illness.
All this time, people felt sorry for me like I was the one being abused.
He spent a week in the hospital after he came out, I just received a divorce summon.
I wanted to say no to divorce, but because I felt this pride, I wanted him to change his mind and beg me.
I called him and said he would get the divorce because I lived like I was in hell.
When we went to court, I wanted to make him pay, so I told the court that I needed his properties to be shared.
To my surprise, he openly told the court that whatever he and I acquired together should be given to me, all he wanted was divorce.
We were divorced in 2009 July.
Now, my husband is married, whilst l am here wasted!
My family members are gossiping about me.
I depend on what my ex-husband gives to my son for survival.
I know I wasted my
marriage.
I am here telling all wives that they should be careful how they get advice.
Don't be cheated, and don't entertain family interference in your marriage, my dear reader.
Even my young sisters are much more respected than me.
Those who encouraged me to get divorced are always teasing and bad-mouthing me.
Please, ladies, be vigilant in your marriage.
Thought it wise to share my story to save your marriage.
There is no benefit in pride for nothing.
Sometimes it's not the man's fault at all, it's your pride, and the people you are allowed to advise you, so be wise and vigilant in your marriage.
Category: Community
Tag: online community, online forum, ask question online, internet community, internet forum
Written by Author (author)
Published 3/29/2024 9:49:46 AM