How Important Is Physical Attraction When Looking For A Spouse?

Is It Compulsory To Get Married?
October 27, 2017
Is It Compulsory To Get Married?
October 27, 2017

Girl meets Boy that she is not attracted to. In the course of their many conversations she realizes he has good qualities and good attributes to make a great husband but she is not physically attracted to him. Girl needs to take a decision.

SOLUTION: Girl should simply weigh what is more important to her in marriage. If good looks outweigh good character, then she should not date or marry Boy. She should wait, pray and hope that the “good looks” boy will soon show up

But the questions girl needs to ask herself are these:

What if the “unattractive” guy is God’s will for you?

Does God see short or tall, fat or thin in humans? Does God see handsome or ugly before He determines who suits you?

Doesn’t the bible say everything God created was good?

When you pray to God for a spouse, do you allow Him to locate His perfect will for you or you negotiate the physical looks part?

These are personal questions that only you can answer. Your sincere answers should resolve the problem for you. I know we all wish and pray for a spouse with 100% completeness but we all know that this is almost impossible to get.

Note: there is nothing wrong in rejecting someone who you are not physically attracted to but make sure the rejection aligns with the will of God. If you like the individual in other areas, perhaps you should give him/her a chance of acquaintance and see if the physical problem can gradually disappear. Many people have overcome this problem this way and got married.

One quick example: a very tall lady once had a colleague who is shorter than her. They became close friends in the office without any strings attached but gradually the young man begins to like the lady and eventually asked her for a relationship which she refused at first because of the height difference even though she has grown to like him as a friend from their closeness in the office. She told her uncle about this challenge one day and the uncle replied “the guy is not the one that is too short. You are the one that is too tall. So you are the issue not him”. That settled it for her. They are married today and I tell you, that marriage is one of the happy marriages I see and admire. The height difference and small stature have completely disappeared psychologically. So, the choice is up to you

Be sincerely careful and prayerful in accepting a beautifully wrapped package. You may open it and find its content valueless. Nevertheless, there are some badly wrapped gifts that also have bad contents of no value. If I wait and can’t find good content/good packaging and I have to choose between (a) good content/bad packaging and (b) bad content/good packaging, I will easily choose (a) over (b). So all I will do is to repackage the person as much as I have capacity to

I hereby close with these paraphrased words…

God does not look on us as we look on each other. We value a man’s surrounding more than the man himself. An artist who loves beauty does not value a picture by its frame. Seeing the picture to be a gem, he buys it and does not care for the frame. So, when the Lord looks at you, He does not value your bank account, your dress, your bodily strength and beauty; He values you – your spirit. A man is measured by his soul.

God bless


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